13 March, 2013

Just ask, I won't bite

"Are you okay?" - "No, I can not complain." Isn't it much better when those who ask really mean it, and takes the time to listen.

"How are you?" "Are you okay?" It's usually such questions we get we who are living with a serious illness. And not everyone is thinking about what they really are asking for and they do not always have time to listen to the answer. "Yeah, I'm fine" and "yes, I feel quite well."

Maybe we should answer honestly, say that "no, unfortunately it's not good at all. I feel absolutely horrible, and I do not know what to do anymore."

Some are too afraid to ask. Some are uncertain about how to face a seriously ill colleague. Some seem uneasy, evasive when they meet us. Some people avoid us altogether.

The worst is perhaps those who are not afraid to ask, but who still are afraid to getting answers. Let it be said once and for all: It is not dangerous! It is better to ask or to tell that you do not know what to say, rather than avoiding the person.

I keep getting told that I look so good and it's so nice that I'm up and going. It's nice that people think I look fresh and alive, for it would have been sad if they think I looked dead.

I try to keep up as best I can and keep my mood up. Today is not the best day, and I do not feel completely on top, and yes, I look tired. And people ask how I am. If you really have time, I'll tell you how I feel. If not, then do not ask.

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